1/30/09

Rock Band and Prayer

I really enjoy playing RockBand; preferably RockBand2 but I'm happy with either! I'm not all that good...I play bass cause its easier than guitar. Anyways, as I played tonight I realized my inability to hit a certain combination of orange/red/green/orange...etc. and then it happened: I became genuinely frustrated that this game was "beating me." I was complaining in my mind about not being able to finish the song. And without realizing it I just began to pray, and in His grace, my mind began to wonder as I prayed, "Why am I frustrated with this game?" Not, "why is this game so stinkin' tough on expert?" Not, "well this is stupid." But rather, "Why am I allowing myself to become frustrated over a game?"

In chapel this morning we heard a powerful message on prayer. Two aspects of the message really stuck with me. First, was this idea of being disciplined in reigning in our minds. That we all too often allow our minds to wander, we lose control over our thoughts, and off they go to places that aren't even logical. Our minds will bring us to places of confusion and frustration where neither of those apply. And Secondly, that our prayers ought not be what we resort to when all the "practical" ideas fail, or when the situation is completely "out of our hands." Prayer, our open audience with the God of the Universe, should be our first response, our resource that in conjunction with reigning in of our minds will keep us focused on what matters, praying how He would desire us to pray.

So, as I sat on the couch fumbling through a frustrated prayer in my head, all of these thoughts came flooding back: "Reign in your mind." "Don't just pray because you're frustrated." "Talk to Him because He's your Savior." "Get over yourself and get over this game."

How often do I pray only when it's convenient? Or perhaps what is more often the case, only when I feel like I've run out of "better" ideas? How often do I simply desire to talk with Him? How often do you simply desire to talk with Him?

1/29/09

Internship

I'm headed to Dondo, Mozambique this summer for a two month internship. Right now, I'm working on putting together my support letter and renewing my passport. This being my fourth trip to Dondo I'm certainly excited to reconnect with friends; on the other hand I'm nervous that I am too familiar with the process. I am afraid that I'll focus on the letter and on raising support instead of focusing on my heart. I am afraid that I'll be too quick to answer instead of listening. I am afraid that I'll want to go go go instead of just taking a breath and having a conversation. I am afraid that even though I see these negatives as a possibility, I won't guard myself against them. As I continue to prepare, please pray for me in this. Pray that I would foresee the danger and take precautions, instead of going blindly on...